Thank you , Mr. Heinlein

Most of my understanding of the feelings I have had from a young age were brought home to me when I started reading the works of Robert Heinlein.

I had always felt uncomfortable in one to one relationship and had been through all the Cheating and Swinging stages and still I felt unfulfilled - it was as if something was missing.

After reading may of Heinlein's books I began to see there was an alternative to Monogamy and then sought out more information on the subject - which has led me to where I am today.

If I were to quote one piece of Heinlein that describes my "meaning" of Polyamory - I guess it would have to be the following from "The Moon is a Harsh Mistress"

Pease Note:- I apply the wording "line marraige" as equating to polyamory in my day to day life...

"They arise as, as marriage customs always do, from economic necessities of the circumstances – and our circumstances are very different from those here on Earth. Take the line type of marriage which my colleague has been praising …. and justifiably, I assure you despite his personal bias – I am a bachelor and have no bias. Line Marriage is the strongest possible device for conserving capital and insuring the welfare of children – the two basic societal functions for marriage everywhere – in an environment in which there is no security, neither for capital nor for children, other than that devised by individuals. Somehow human beings always cope with their environment. Line Marriage is a remarkably successful invention to that end.�

Read into that what you will and move some words around but it is something that has always brought home to me the need for some viable alternatives to monogomy...

Be first to comment this article | Add as favourites (0) | Quote this article on your site | Views: 876

What is Polyamory to Me Personally?

© Astarte Earthwise 2004

Polyamory is a coined word combining the Greek words for many (Poly) and "love" (Amory).

Polyamory describes a lifestyle in which its okay to love more than one person. I am currently practicing and firmly committed to the concept of Open Relationships as a conscious and loving lifestyle. The goal of a responsible Open Relationship is to cultivate ongoing, long-term, complex relationships which are rooted in deep mutual friendships of intimacy and care for each other.

The word Polyamory was first created and used by Oberon Zell after reading the book Stranger in a Strange Land by Robert A. Heinleins 1961 science fiction novel, Oberon Zell is probably best known as the founder of the Church of All Worlds, a Neo-Pagan religious organisation with Nests and Proto-Nests worldwide.

Not all Polyamorous people have more than one lover all the time. I have gone through single periods, I have entered into long-term paired relationships, I have teamed up with an existing couple, And I have been a part of a couple that has taken on others, some people even get married, while continuing to identify as polyamorous. For me, having the option to love others is more important than exercising it. I am definitely not a swinger, I don’t have Sex just for the sake of sex, I need to connect with my heart and mind to someone to be intimate, I do so believing that we will continue to explore each other, I am not interested in one nite stands. Often my Poly partners I could say felt more like brothers or sisters that I share myself fully with. It’s a loving, respectful and mutual caring relationship I seek, without the confinement, ownership and restrictions that come with Monogamy.

I am not anti-monogamy; it just is not my choice right now. I have had very successful Monogamous relationships two of which lasted for a period of seven years each. I have NEVER been unfaithful, or needed to lie or cheat to a partner. Honesty and Openness are the foundations of the polyamorous lifestyle. Having multiple sexual relations while lying to your partners or trying to pretend that each one is the "one true love" is a very superficial and selfishly destructive way to live. And not healthy for any of the people involved.

Be first to comment this article | Add as favourites (0) | Quote this article on your site | Views: 2178